Thunder Bird House

Entries from January 2008

A plea for help….

January 31, 2008 · 3 Comments

Click on the Avatar with out a photo you will find the article and video.

Immediate attention required…click on http://www.newsobserver.com, click the News tab, click local and state tab, click on “Promise of Protection. You will be able to view an unbelievable news video and read the story. You will also be able to see depostion clips of officers who failed to protect a family who lived directly across the street from the police. We need help. please contact me at the above email address asap. that you in advance.

Categories: A plea for help

Helping kids who have witnessed Domestic Violence

January 29, 2008 · Leave a Comment

To Help Kids Who Have Witnessed Domestic Violence.

  • Provide them with a space to talk about what happened. Younger kids may lack the ability to express their emotions. Perhaps propose drawing activities to help them express themselves and what happened. Do not push the child to talk, he will in his own time. Rather, create an atmosphere which is favorable to confidence and the expression of emotions.
  • Do not make promises to “keep the secret” because if the child divulges abuse on himself (or herself), you won’t be able to keep that promise. Rather, tell the child that he/she is safe with you and that if there is something he/she would like to talk about, you will be able to help.
  • Tell the child it wasn’t her/his fault.
  • If the child shows violent behaviors it is important to take position against violence, in all its shapes or forms. However, it is important to remember that most children who suffer from PTSD will act out and thus, their “violence” is not a sign that the child is himself “violent like his father”. In this sense, it is important to give the child a space to express his anger and feelings in non-threatening ways. These children do not need to be disciplined, they need to be understood.
  • Give the child some time to open up to you. His/her trust has been harshly tested and it may take them time to open up to your efforts.
  • It may be important to seek professional consultation for children who have witnessed domestic violence.

Categories: Advocate · Domestic Violence · Eighteen and Under · Female Victim · I have no place to go I'm afraid · I'm tired of being bullied · Male Victim · Someone is hurting me · Victims of Crime · Witnessing Domestic Violence
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Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in Children

January 29, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in Children

Traumatic stress is produced by exposure to events that are so extreme or severe and threatening, that they demand extraordinary coping efforts. Such events are often unpredicted and uncontrollable. They overwhelm a person’s sense of safety and security. Children are more at risk for post traumatic stress disorder than adults because they lack the cognitive abilities as well as the emotional understanding that helps people cope with traumatic events such as witnessing battering. From the point of view of a child, domestic violence is more than “daddy hits mommy” or “daddy says that mommy is stupid”. From their point of view, their main attachment figure and source of life is being attacked and hurt by an equally loved adult who alternates between acts of violence and acts of love. This is all very confusing for children to witness.

More than half of the school-age children in domestic violence shelters show clinical levels of anxiety or post-traumatic stress disorder (Graham-Bermann, 1994). Without treatment, these children are at significant risk for delinquency, substance abuse, school drop-out, and difficulties in their own relationships.

Children may exhibit a wide range of reactions to exposure to violence in their home. Younger children (e.g., pre-school and kindergarten) oftentimes, do not understand the meaning of the abuse they observe and tend to believe that they “must have done something wrong.” Self-blame can precipitate feelings of guilt, worry, and anxiety. It is important to consider that children, especially younger children, typically do not have the ability to adequately express their feelings verbally. Consequently, the manifestation of these emotions are often behavioral. Children may become withdrawn, non-verbal, and exhibit regressed behaviors such as clinging and whining. Eating and sleeping difficulty, concentration problems, generalized anxiety, and physical complaints (e.g., headaches) are all common.

Unlike younger children, the pre-adolescent child typically has greater ability to externalize negative emotions (e.g., to verbalize). In addition to symptoms commonly seen with childhood anxiety (e.g., sleep problems, eating disturbance, nightmares), victims within this age group may show a loss of interest in social activities, low self-concept, withdrawal or avoidance of peer relations, rebelliousness and oppositional-defiant behavior in the school setting. It is also common to observe temper tantrums, irritability, frequent fighting at school or between siblings, lashing out at objects, treating pets cruelly or abusively, threatening of peers or siblings with violence (e.g., “give me a pen or I will smack you”), and attempts to gain attention through hitting, kicking, or choking peers and/or family members. Incidentally, girls are more likely to exhibit withdrawal and unfortunately, run the risk of being overlooked as a child in need of support.

Adolescents are at risk of academic failure, school drop-out, delinquency, and substance abuse. Some investigators have suggested that a history of family violence or abuse is the most significant difference between delinquent and non delinquent youth. An estimated 1/5 to 1/3 of all teenagers who are involved in dating relationships are regularly abusing or being abused by their partners verbally, mentally, emotionally, sexually, and/or physically (SASS, 1996).

Categories: Eighteen and Under · Female Victim · Male Victim · Someone is hurting me · University can be lonely · Witnessing Domestic Violence
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Boys to Men witnessing Domestic Violence

January 29, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Witnessing Domestic Violence in childhood  and Violence Later in Life

Men who have witnessed their parents domestic violence are three times more likely to abuse their own wives than children of non-violent parents, with the sons of the most violent parents being 1000 times more likely to become perpetrators of domestic abuse.
(Straus, M.A., Gelles, R.J. & Steinmetz, S. Behind closed Doors. Doubleday, Anchor. 1980)

Memories of men in Lock Up Raw on MSNBC on death row and those with life sentances with out parole have grown up in violent homes.

Categories: Domestic Violence · Eighteen and Under · Male Victim · Witnessing Domestic Violence
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Domestic Violence and Child Abuse

January 29, 2008 · Leave a Comment

About Domestic Violence and Child Abuse

In a national survey of over 6,000 American families, 50% of the men who frequently assaulted their wives also frequently abused their children.
(Straus, M.A. & Gelles, R.J. (eds.). Physical violence in American families. New Brunswick, NJ, Transaction Publishers. 1990.)

Child abuse is 15 times more likely to occur in families where domestic violence is present.
(Stacy, W. and Shupe, A. The Family Secret. Boston, MA. Beacon Press, 1983.)

Older children are frequently assaulted when they intervene to defend or protect their mothers.
(Hilberman and Munson, 1977-78)

Female abuse is also the context for sexual abuse of female children. In households where the mother is assaulted by the father, daughters are exposed to a risk of sexual abuse 6.5 times greater than girls in nonabusive families
(Bowker, Arbitell, and McFerron, 1988)

Categories: Domestic Violence · Eighteen and Under · I have no place to go I'm afraid · I'm tired of being bullied · Someone is hurting me · Victims of Crime · Witnessing Domestic Violence
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Witnessing the violence

January 29, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Children and Domestic Violence

A Few Facts…

About Witnessing the violence

Over 3 million children are at risk of exposure to parental violence each year.
(Carlson, B.E. . “Children’s Observations of Interparental Violence” in Edwards, A.R. (ed.). Battered Women and Their Families. New York: Springer. pp. 147-167. 1984. )

The majority of the children from violent homes observe the violence inflicted by their fathers upon their mothers; most research suggests as many as 90 percent of children from violent homes witness their fathers battering their mothers
(Pagelow, 1990; Walker, 1984)
About the Effects of Witnessing Violence

Children who witness violence at home display emotional and behavioral disturbances as diverse as withdrawal, low self-esteem, nightmares, self-blame and aggression against peers, family members and property.
(Peled, Inat, Jaffe, Peter G. & Edleson, Jeffrey L. (Eds.) Ending the Cycle of Violence: Community Responses to Children of Battered Women. Thousand Oaks, California: Sage Publications, 1995)

A comparison of delinquent and nondelinquent youth found that a history of family violence or abuse is the most significant difference between the two groups.
(Miller, G. “Violence By and Against America’s Children,” Journal of Juvenile Justice Digest, XVII(12) p.6. 1989)

In comparing children not exposed to violence as contrasted to children who witness violence and children who both witness and are abused, data suggest that the latter two groups are most comparable and have heightened behavioral and emotional distress as compared to the former
(Hughes et al., 1989).

Boys become aggressive, fighting with siblings and schoolmates and having temper tantrums. Girls are more likely to become passive, clinging, and withdrawn.
(Hilberman and Munson, 1977-78)

Categories: Crisis Line · Eighteen and Under · I'm tired of being bullied · Someone is hurting me · University can be lonely · Victims of Crime · Witnessing Domestic Violence
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Homeless Shelters

January 29, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Salvation Army-Homeless

113 South 2nd Avenue

Wausau, WI -54401-

715-845-6583

Salvation Army-Union Center

626 Union Court

Green Bay, WI -54303-

920-497-7053

New Community Shelter-Homeless

301 Mather Street

Green Bay, WI -54303-

920-437-3766

Categories: Uncategorized
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Law Enforcement

January 25, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Hayward Police

(715) 634-8961

Sawyer County Sheriff

(715) 634-4858

Dispatch

(715) 634-5213

Lac du Flambeau Tribal Police Department

(715) 588-7717 or 911

Vilas County Sheriff Department

1-800-471-7290 or 911

Minocqua Police Department

(717) 356-3234 or 911

Categories: Uncategorized
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Legal Advice

January 25, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Sawyer County District Attorney

(715) 634-4097

State Public Defenders

(715) 635-3770

Judicare Service (low Income)

800-472-1638

Lawyer Referral

800-362-9082

Categories: Legal Advice
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Wisconsin Help Lines

January 25, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Oakwood Haven (LCO)

Domestic & Sexual Abuse Shelter

(715) 634-9360

Crisis Line

1-877-552-7474

Sawyer County Sexual Assault Advocate

Hayward WI

(715) 638-3451

CASDA Crisis Line Abuse Center

1-800-649-2921

Time Our Family Abuse

1-800-924-0556

Ladysmith, WI

(715) 532-7089

New Day Shelter

1-800-924-4132

Ashland

(715) 682-9565

Native American

1-800-236-7660

WI State Wide Shelter

(715) 588-7660

WI Coalition Against Domestic Violence

(608) 255-0539

WI Coalition Against Sexual Assault

(608) 257-1516

Stevens Point

1-800-472-3377

River Falls

1-800-338-2882

Monroe

1-800-836-9788

Milltown

1-800-261-7233

Bolton Refuge/Eau Claire

1-800-252-4357

Chippewa Falls

1-800-400-7020

People Against Violence/Beaver Dam

1-800-775-3785

Hopehouse

1-800-584-6794


 

 

 

Categories: About Us · Crisis Line · Domestic Violence · Eighteen and Under · Elder Abuse · I have no place to go I'm afraid · Male Victim · Safety Plan · Someone is hurting me · Stalking · Tempoary restraining orders · Victims Rights · Victims of Crime
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